Inner Beauty and Outer Beauty

The false dichotomy between inner beauty and outer beauty has been a source of confusion to many. This is to make the clarifications needed to overcome this confusion.

The two concepts - inner beauty and outer beauty - refer to very different and unrelated things. A better term for "inner beauty" is "personal goodness." And there is no reason why personal goodness would be related, one way or another, to physical appearance. Unrelated concepts mean: zero correlation. It will be possible to find both personal goodness and lack of personal goodness at every level of physical attractiveness; and it will be possible to find physical beauty and lack of physical beauty at every level of personal goodness.

Thus, my daughter, my mother, my sister, and the women I've loved, all had both inner beauty and outer beauty. Whereas Andrea Dworkin and most of her followers are both physically ugly and horrible people. These horrible people then claim ridiculously to speak for a half of the world's population even as they command other women to toe their malignant line and maliciously attack and abuse those who would not. I doubt I am the only person who believes that women deserve a better representation than is afforded by these jerks.

It is much more sensible that women's representatives be the best, not the worst, among women. The women possessing of both personal goodness and physical beauty have far more to offer the world than women who possess neither and are against both. They also stand to make vastly superior role models to other women and motivate other women to be their best, rather than their worst, even as they stand to improve men's view of women by presenting before them a different, vastly more deserving and sympathetic, picture of womanhood.

Being sympathetic toward women's rights and advancement does not require accepting wrongdoing on the part of those who falsely claim to be speaking for women. Instead a person sympathetic toward the preceding would very much take the side of the women who are being attacked by the same. A harpy is not, nor was it ever, a valid feminine ideal. Besides the "traditional" maternal ideal there are others - professional woman, artistic woman, activist woman, working woman, high achiever woman - that are also valid; and all of the above are better both for the women who are doing it and for the rest of the world.

The dichotomy between outer beauty and inner beauty is therefore a false one. The two are unrelated to one another. We will see both good people and bad people at every level of physical appearance. And we will see both physically beautiful and physically ugly people at every level of personal goodness.

What is Inner Beauty


Inner beauty is the most important feature in our human being. All of our actions in a day draw from that inner beauty or soul, if you wish. Have you ever wondered what makes you act the way you do or who you are, inside? Are we are just a collection of cells that happened to come together by chance or is there some grand design someone we can't see or touch that brought us all together? Inner beauty shows itself in many ways perhaps by helping an elderly neighbor with their yard work or volunteering your time to your community.

Love is an expression of inner beauty. Does one give love on a daily basis? Does one feel Loved on a daily basis? Hope is a belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one's life and the lives of others. This can only come from a place of inner beauty. Do you feel compassion toward another human being when you see them in pain or suffering? Compassion comes from inner beauty, at times you can feel it tug at your heart, sometimes you can ignore it but deep down it's always there.

What about outer beauty? Can outer beauty, say a beautiful waterfall, a majestic mountain or the brilliant stars in heaven, be enjoyed without inner beauty? I think not. A person can be attracted by outward beauty only to find on closer examination that it is ugly on the inside. A beautiful looking person can be filled with hatred or with love. But how do we know unless we look on the inside? We often judge people when we first meet them by the way they look. It has always been said; you cannot judge a book by its cover. So look inside when you first meet people and look for that inner beauty, in the long run it is far more important than outward beauty.

What can physical things in life do for the soul? The answer is "nothing". You need to fill the soul otherwise it starves. Is your inner soul starving? You can satisfy the hunger with acts of kindness and love, there is plenty in this world to fill the soul. Use it every day and I believe you will be full in no time. After 9/11 I felt love and compassion for all of my fellow Americans, I remember sitting at a toll booth waiting for the person in front of me, fumbling to find the correct change. Any other time I would have been a bit angry at the wait but this time I would have waited all day without anger. I believe it was because we were all one during that time, one country, one people. Why can't it be like that every day as we work, play and live?

I don't have all the answers nor do I proclaim to be fault free but I do know the feelings of my own heart. I am sure that each one of us has thought some of these very things at some point in our lives. I don't want to be on my death bed saying, "I did it all wrong"; there are no do overs. Your inner beauty can flourish and grow, no one can quell it and no one can take it away.